Oh, wow! I just got back from a live performance of the first part of Handel's Messiah. What could be more inspiring than that great piece of music at any time of year, but particularly in December with the first real snow on the ground?
For my little city of Klamath Falls, it was an amazing production. A couple of the soloists could be called impressive, and the chorus had obviously practiced for hours. They were wonderful.
But the real star of it of course is Handel's magnificent music that lifts you up to the skies. From the opening "Comfort ye my people" until the final piece of the first part, "His yoke is easy…" it was splendid. And of courses they added the Hallelujah chorus on the end.
Some things hit me in a new way this year. The singing about leveling mountains and lifting up valleys so the way is flat - I'm asking myself if that is really a good thing. My life at least seems more defined by the highs and lows. Do I really want it all evened out? I would miss those mountain top experiences.
And of course, it covers one of my pet peeves at the moment - the equating of darkness with badness or evil. Like we need both highs and lows, we need both darkness and light. To be forced to live in constant darkness would be bad; to be forced to live in constant light would be too. Growth begins in the dark, continues in the light, and eventually returns to the dark.
But all in all, it was a glorious evening, and I am so glad I went.
I don't think I have ever heard the whole thing. Just the usual bits that end up on CDs. I agree with you that the "flat way" isn't that great. I used to be a very high and low kind of person. I have been depressed a few times in my life, but usually not. I would get very excited or happy at times--those mountaintop experiences. But Klamath Falls changed me and I am still trying to get past that. I am not so thrilled with the person I am now. I worked really hard to be level because I got to a point where I knew that the last depression could kill me. I really tried to cultivate that detachment in order to survive. And I was able to pull it off. But now I am so detached that I am numb. When I engage it is usually from fear or an expectation that things are about to go very wrong. A few times over the past few weeks, I have been sitting here crocheting and listening to Christmas music with my big mug of steaming tea next to me. I have felt stirrings of happiness. And then another part of my mind comes zooming in to remind me that this is not good. It won't do to be happy or to look forward to anything because it will all only go wrong in the end. It makes me sad because I miss feeling joy. But I learned in Klamath Falls that I could not engage in any kind of hope or excitement because it was bound to come apart in the end. So I am still working at trying to get my old self back. I think it will take a little while because for me K falls was a deep, deep valley that for a time I honestly thought I would never escape from.
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